Tangerine Tree of Life, by Jasper

For much of the life of the blog, I have been irregular at best. Often times I would disappear for weeks or months at a time, caught up in Mockingbard Mayhem, only to return wondering if I can try again to maintain or sustain. Obviously, my success rate is nil.

My intentions are to passionately pursue writing so that someday I can earn more money than my sweet wife, Sydney. Yet, while I have intentions, I lack the discipline to follow through on my goal. So, it remains a dream.

This has been apparently the case for much of my existence. Success only comes when it is something that I really want. For example, consider when it was determined that I had to go back to work. The job was something that I (we) really wanted to happen. In short time, I accomplished my most important task for the client, though a certain level of personal gratification was achieved. Soon afterwards I was laid off. As with previous states of redundancy, I thrust myself into indifference once again.

Though the situation described above covers a significant life event, I have found parallels in the mundane.

As you undoubtedly learned from following the links I included (which you clicked because you were really, really curious, and then pleasantly surprised to learn that Jasper has written good stuff in the past), that particular life event sent my world into another state of flux.

Anyway, let me move away from the "Jasper's world has changed... again" saga.

My dear Mother decided to celebrate this significant life event (no, I will not tell you directly- read the laid off story) by giving us a tangerine tree. Her father used to have tangerine trees in his yard. As a child, Mother enjoyed picking fresh fruit. To honor that memory, as well as honor our recent success, she purchased a tangerine tree for us.

It was my job to plant it. This was a relatively easy task, and it was my intention to complete it quickly. There's that word again... intention. Curses!

Weeks passed. The tangerine sapling remained in its pot. "I'll get to it," was uttered regularly. The occasional afternoon rain shower quenched its thirst through the summer. The tree was healthy and content.

Fall had come and gone, our gift had not been planted. Old leaves fell. New leaves sprouted. The tree remained in good health, but was growing impatient.

Soon a "bitter" winter enveloped Florida. The tangerine tree could not defend itself from freezing temperatures. Trunk and branches turned brown. Leaves died and fell. The tree had met its end.

Or so we thought.

Little did we know, the tangerine tree had the soul of a mighty oak. As spring approached, the tiny sapling was returning to life. The green of the trunk and branches was returning. Leaves were sprouting. Tangerine had risen!

Ten months had been long enough! It was time to plant!

And then it was time to procrastinate again. The tree was in good condition and flourishing. It would be fine. "I'll get to it," was the tune again.

However, there was a new chorus, "Your parents are coming soon." Oh. Worry set in, mildly.

It was a month before their scheduled arrival. The tangerine tree was still in the pot and looking peaked. Uh-oh. Panic. The tree must be planted.

Nothing happened. I (we) were busy. Too busy to plant a tree apparently. Dumb.

Then it happened. Within a week, the tangerine tree went from blossoming to stone dead.

I had taunted it with promises of planting. It had held onto hope. I had failed. The tangerine tree gave until it could give no more. Sydney and I stared hopelessly at the tangerine tree. Tears streamed from our faces. Not even the dramatic falling teardrop onto the browned branch could bring it back to life.

Sigh. Procrastination brought death. I think it was the first for me.

What would we tell my Mother?

That's easy. A lie. Nothing elaborate.

The story would tell itself: Yes, we procrastinated planting the tree (they would ask about it from time to time; I think they last asked in the spring). I finally planted, but it had been too late. The tree must have been on the brink of death, so it didn't last long. Poor tree. I was able to replace it easily.

On Sunday, Sydney and I did replace the tree. We bought a slightly older tree, one that is already bearing fruit. I had intended on planting it on Monday. That didn't happen. So I planted it yesterday. Hurray!

Indifference had been overcome, with a little push of the panic induced by the impending arrival of the parents. Nevertheless, I deem it a success. The tangerine tree was placed in the ground before indifference (or death) could take its grip.

Mother or Father should be here in 5 hours. They will ask about the tree within 12 hours of their arrival. I am certain of it. The lie will flow from my lips without hesitation. Mother will be annoyed and express her ire at my procrastination. I suspect her mood will change once she sees the fruit.

Perhaps this should be a lesson for me: Indifference leads to death.

Maybe I'll learn from it. I don't know. Who cares?

Tangerine, Tangerine
Living reflection from a dream
Procrastination was my queen
And now a thousand years between.